Tuesday 7th June

Ryan giggs has been caught shagging his sister in law. Why is every one surprised? firstly, he is welsh, they shag anything, secondly, he is a man, we shag anything and thirdly, he is an overpaid namby pamby footballer, they shag everything. I only hope his brother who he has done the wrongest of crimes against (if wrongest aint a word then it should be) waits til Ryan aint suspecting it, then whacks him in the cock with a metal pole and throws his dirty cheating pooper wife out a high window. I will bet any money you like the silly dirty cheating slut says that Ryan Giggs told her he loved her. I bet we will soon see photos of her in skimpy knickers cos she wants to be a model (I hope there are photos, oo er missus). This disgusting man has been held up as a role model for years, and look what happens, he turns out to be as big a dirty shit as the rest of these so called leaders of men. I am not surprised, and what make it even worse is that his dumb dopey wife will forgive him (lets be fair, the the dirty shagger is worth a fortune). I also don't understand the hoohah over the Playboy club opening in London. It provides jobs for boobly enhanced women who can't get proper jobs and if soapy disgusting men want to pay six quid a pint then so be it. Did you notice all the ugly looking women protesting outside? Jealous bunch of crop haired hairy legged can't get a man bow wows. Good luck to that dirty old perv Hugh Heffner, I'm sure his twenty eight year old fiance really loves him. And more importantly, lets feel sorry for Cheryl (toilet attendant basher) Cole, sacked from whatever show she was useless at and she has to get speaking lessons for her new job, well lets be honest, it is really difficult to ask some one if "they want fries with that". I saw David Beckham on telly meeting the Pope, am I the only one who cringed when Beckham asked the Pope how Mrs Pope was?. As I drove home from the gyn today I saw a sign near a school that said "Slow children crossing" at first I thought that was considerate to warn us drivers but then I thought, the slow children must be feeling quite ashamed, well the ones that can read. My lady friend has been celibate since her divorce four years ago and I just found out that she has caught E.Coli from a cucumber, lifes a bitch, la la la . Boris Johnson??? dont get me started.