IS THIS YOUR CAR

I got stopped the police in my car today. It's not the first time but its still fecking annoying. I was driving along listening to my 'Teach yourself Italian' cd which the lovely Levi made for me and in the opposite direction a police car was passing. I took no notice, I wasn't speeding all my lights work, I'm not wanted by the police and my car is fully legal. Amyway this police car had two cops in it and as the they passed the driver gave me a filty look. I look back at him then just ignored them. I looked in my rear view mirror and saw the car turn around, I thought 'bloody hell not again'. I was on a side road so I turned right and got on to a main road and sure enough these two bastards followed me. I kept going and made sure I didn't over do the speed. Just ahead was a McDonalds drive in so I headed for that. Sure enough the bacon followed me in and I pulled into a bay and got out. The plod parked across my car blocking me in and the driver called out 'just a minute you' I stopped and waited for the plod to come over. The driver said 'where are you going sir?' I looked around and pointed at the giant yellow M and replied 'where do you think I'm going' bacon number two said 'no need to get funny, its a reasonable question'. I said 'we are in a McDonalds drive in, and you ask me where I'm going, its not a reasonable question its a daft one'. Bacon number one asked 'is that your car sir' I said yes, so he said 'whats the registration?. I said move you car and I will read it to you' bacon numberr two said 'don't you know your own number? I said yes but I was gonna let you watch me read it to you. Bacon one said 'its only a routine stop, you looked a bit iffy when we passed you' I said 'no, I looked a bit black when you passed me' this got their backs up and bacon one said indignantly' are you calling all police officers racist? I replied, 'not all of you, just the one's that stop me two or three times every week for no reason' bacon number two asked 'what's your name sir? I said radio in my number plate and the name you get is mine' bacon one reached for his radio and whilst he was doing that bacon two walked over to my car and tried the door. It was locked he looked at me and asked me to open the door. I said 'no, show me a warrant or call for back up cos I aint helping you at all' bacon one got off the radio and asked my name so I told him and he said to the other bacon 'lets go, he's clean' they got in their car and I got in mine, the driving bacon said 'I thought you wanted something to eat? And I replied, 'you have put me off my food'. I hate cops, I try not to but I fecking do. I was half thinking about voting for Brian Paddick but he can go and feck himself now. Better still he can go and feck Ken Livingston instead. I hate cops, I don't think they are all racist I just think they are all bastards.