JUNK FOOD TAX

Those bloody Yankers are at it again. I read in todays paper that the powers that be across the pond want to impose a 20 - 30% tax on fast food. Apparently, the pencil pushing, lentil munching, tree hugging, sandal wearing carrot crunching scraggly beard brigade have just finished a two year survey and have just found out that people prefer to pay less for fizzy drinks and sweets. REALLY? It took two years to learn the bleeding obvious? Now they want to put the price of fast food up to deter people from buying it. What a load of crap. We don't need a survey to tell us to we prefer to spend less on food. In fact we have a perfectly good system that dictates how we spend our money. Those that can't afford to shop at Marks and Spencer shop at Tesco, those that can't afford Tesco go to Iceland and those that can't afford Iceland go to Lidls. I can picture it now, some fat slob wobbling to his doctor and whinging that he is fat but its not his fault and I can see the doctor patting him on the knee saying 'there there, you poor thing, I will send you to the hospital where you can have a gastric band costing several thousand pounds fitted free on the NHS and in a couple of years when you have lost a bit of weight we will take it out and you can go back to eating yourself to death' .What the doctor should do is look the fat pig in the eye and say ' put down that box of cream cakes you tubbo and go for a jog'. It amazes me that TV is bombarded by McDonalds and Burger King adverts and yet they want to put the price up. You never see adverts for the local Chinese takeaway do you ? I have been to america a few times and I have to say I'm not impressed. The first time I went to Disneyland I saw so many fat people, I thought it was a retirement village for sumo wrestlers. Its not the long queues that bothered me it was the length of time it took squeezing the slobs into the rides. We have some lovely parks in this country but the only people who use them are junkies muggers and rapists. I have decided I don't want to be London Mayor any more, I want to be Prime Minister. The one we curly have is a chinless wonder who is too spineless to stand up against other nations sticking their noses in our business. I would round up all the very fat people and get a cattle prod and chase them round a park for one hour every day til they lost enough weight. There are two reasons why people are fat. One, they don't excercise and two they stuff way too much food in that hole in the middle of their face. If you can't afford a gym membership because you spunk all your money on chocolate and crisps, go for a walk, its free (well it is now until the government can find a way to tax it). We should stop being nice to these two legged hippos. Tell them the truth, you ain't obese, YOU ARE FAT. Now put down that packet of biscuits and start running. Vote for me. La la la