CRISIS AVERTED

Wow what a day, I'm off today and I have a lot planned. First i'm meeting Keef for a game of squash. Now and again we get together and I let him wipe the floor with me. It's my way of helping those less fortunate. Anyway, the day didn't start too well, my electric toothbrush was flat and momentarily I was at a loss as to what to do. I almost rang MCL, well its just ML now because all her felines are defunct, but luckily my second child was on his laptop so I got him to use the interweb to show me how to use one of those old manual brushes. It took longer to search then it did to use. Anyway I left home with a fine rack of pearly whites. I arrived on time but grandad Keef was a bit tardy, he left home in his PJs again and Mrs Keef had to call him back and re dress him. Still we had fun and I let him win quite overwhelmimgly and sent him on his way with a smile and a lob on. Then I met ML for a soft gym sesh, she worked as hard as I would expect a member of the fairer sex to work, I saw a glisten of sweat then she packed up and had a box of fags. She did buy me a pint and we had some lunch. I put a load of washing in the machine, its mainly darks so I went easy on the Lenor, i'm now off to circuit training, so yes I will have trained THREE times today. Why am I still fat??. It cant possibly be the Stella in the fridge. Mr Bailey was upset at the price of an underground ticket so when I become mayor my first order of business is to ban whining bastards from travelling. La la la