WHY OH WHY

Why oh why did I decide to try and go through January alcohol free? Today I have six days left and I am doing my utmost to resist and if I say so myself I am doing extremely well because I have not touched a drop. I have trained extremely hard as well this month. I have trained so far on average better then every other day this month. On one day, I went to the gym in the morning, then I played golf then in the evening I had a spin class, so that was a good health day. But I digress, can I say again that so far this month I have not had a single drop of alcohol and I feel awesome. I feel better inside, I'm sleeping very well, I have much more energy, my skin is softer and less wrinkled, my taste buds are tingling again and my mental acuity is bang on. Having said that I'm walking around like an angry bear with nappy rash, I'm growling and snapping at everyone, nothing makes me chuckle and I'm clucking for a drink. Six long bloody days to go and I assure you on that sixth day do not stand between me and my fridge because I will trample you to death to get my hands on the beer currently sitting on the door shelf waiting for their inevitable demise. So what else has been happening on my sober journey. Well now that I'm going to work sober, I don't seem to enjoy the job as much. Those coastal munters are even more horrendous to look at and twice as unbearable to be around. The weather has been abysmal. Who the feck likes snow? I hate snow, always have always will. I don't even buy Christmas cards with snow on. It never ceases to amaze me when I watch the news and see people who are bonkersmental going out in extreme snow conditions and getting so stuck they have to call out the emergency services. These morons should sign waivers saying that they do these daft dangerous things in full awareness that rescuers will not be sent to get them out of any difficulty they may get into. I see the ginger prince is in trouble for saying killing the enemy is like playing video games. If what he said was so offensive, why was it aired on tv? What about the video of the soldier being beheaded by the Taliban, wasn't that? The telly is full of adverts for holidays, am I the only one who finds those adverts dumb and boring? The telly has been awash with rehashed programmes and I think this years biggest turkey is the new Yes Prime Minister. Many years ago when the milk snatcher was Prime Minister the show was fairly amusing, the new version is so bad words fail me to describe how fucking awful it is, oh hang on, there we go, the new show is fucking awful. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I am still here and will be back to full ranting in just over a week but some things never change, there are some people who I still dislike immensely, (Jay Brook, Ken Livingston, Boris Johnson, Nick Clegg and Russell Brand, the Beckhams are still irritating on a global level and the French are still being French). You will be pleased to know my next two books are close to completion, so please buy my E book, A Clean Week. Here are two interesting facts. 1. pumice is the only rock that floats and 2. if you count one second at a time it will take eleven and a half days to reach one million. la la la diddley dee.